Return of the Carpet Destroyer

Seriously. The last time it was mildy funny… after a few days. This time, I’m just, it’s just, I’m… ARGH!

We got new carpet put in downstairs in October, so OF COURSE the dog needed to christen it.

With explosive liquid shit.

In the middle of the night.


(See the reference here)

We should’ve seen it coming, since we’d been cleaning up dog barf all day yesterday… but really, who can predict that their dog will run around in circles on the brand new carpet while spraying oily goo out of its ass?

Anyway… at least this time I had a “recipe” on hand for a cleanup solution. And it didn’t include Cranberry Febreze or Downy Wrinkle Releaser (mainly because Adam didn’t make it). So, armed with a bucket -o- oxyclean, bleach, woolite and scalding water, the zombie versions of Adam and I crawled around the living room for over an hour this “morning” scrubbing up dog shit. We concluded, after inspecting the puddles, that Tali ate too much wood while playing outside. That’s all we can come up with – there was no bacon grease involved this time.

And, just for you… a tidbit of the conversation during The Great Carpet Cleanup of 2011:

Adam: *hack cough cough hack*

Me: Ew.

Adam: (opens trash sack with soiled paper towels that we’ve been carrying along the trail of cleanup and hawks a lugi  into it)

Me: Oh SICK! *gag* Did you have to do that? GROSS! *gag gag, slight dryheave*

Adam: I’m sorry, am I the disgusting part of this whole situation??

Me: What? People spitting grosses me out.

Adam: Let me remind you what we are currently doing.

Me: Well you don’t have to make it worse by spitting.

Adam: NOTHING could make this worse. NOTHING.

And then we laaaaaaaaaaaughed.


1 reply
  1. Danya Sanchez
    Danya Sanchez says:

    Adam should be glad it was on the carpet. A few years ago I let our little dog, Buddy, sleep with us in the bed. Most of the night went well, until about 2 am in the morning I wake up to Jared freaking out and screaming. I am thinking he is hurting or something is wrong with the apartment. However, Buddy had crawled from under the sheet and popped a squat on Jared’s chest and let out a stinky explosive shit!

    Jared was very very upset, and it was his last day of finals.hehe

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