Kiss My Tissue

Last night I did something awful to my back while I was in the shower with Ellie… Like a scene out of a movie, I bent over to pick her up, felt something slip, and then couldn’t stand upright for like 15 minutes. What’s SUPER awesome about this scenario is that my husband is out hunting for the week… So I’m aaalllllll alone with a crap back and a squirmy baby.

Blah blah blah, pain pain pain, so I went in to see a chiropractor first thing this morning. He asked 8,000 questions, took some xrays and then informed me that I had definitely broken my tailbone in a cheerleading accident back in ’02. Apparently, my last 2 chiropractors MISSED THAT SMALL FACT. Ridiculous.

Anyway, I’m going in for some more treatments, adjustments and massage therapy and hopefully I’ll be able to strengthen my back muscles enough to support my dumb spine- which is apparently out of whack from accidents, carrying heavy things on a daily basis, and childbirth.

Here is a portion of our doctor-patient conversation that I thought would give you a snicker:

Dr: Well, it’s kind of difficult to see the bottom of your spine in this xray, because there’s a lot of tissue down here in this area.

Me: Oh, you mean my fat ass tissue?

Dr: Yes. I MEAN NO! No, that’s not what I meant. It’s just that on this particular xray angle your tailbone is difficult to see.

Me: Awesome. Nice save, dude.

Happy Friday!
Love, Mrs. Fat Fast

6 replies
  1. mike ko
    mike ko says:

    a coccyx fracture is very unlikely in 2002 because you would not have been able to sit in a chair at school. a lot of coccyx are naturally angled…likely an overcall on the chiropractor’s part.

    i am a radiologist.

    good luck

  2. SuperwifeJenny
    SuperwifeJenny says:

    I couldn’t!! I remember it was AWFUL. I couldn’t sit, walking was excruciating, and even moving my neck to look down was super painful.

    The xrays we looked at again today showed a really small fracture, not necessarily an angle. I totally believe it. I was a wreck for months.

    Ugh, back problems suck!

    PS. I giggled every single time I read the word “coccyx” just now.

  3. Carollynn
    Carollynn says:

    I think coccyx is a funny word too. And kumquat. Hope you have a speedy recovery. No heavy lifting or cleaning!

  4. Annette Mullen
    Annette Mullen says:

    I broke mine BAD when I was in my 20’s, nothing but trouble since… sorry honey… wish it would be better…

  5. Mom
    Mom says:

    I remember when you did that! You were in sooooo much pain. I felt so bad because there wasn’t anything you could do for it. I bruised mine when I was cheerleading, (Yes, waaaaay back in the day)! I remember then that I could not walk, sit, or do basically anything without seriously sucking in my breath. Everything I did was painful for a couple of weeks. You were much worse. AND I don’t know how that could get much worse! Sorry sweetie, hang in there. Love you!

  6. Cathy Flynn
    Cathy Flynn says:

    I cracked my coccyx in my 20’s. Pretty funny to say you cracked where you have a crack. Anyway, I had to sit in a donut (not a glazed one – a big pillow with a hole) for a good month. It’s basically healed now, but I always feel a sharp pain in my butt every time it’s about to rain. Maybe it’ll be the same for you, and Ellie will think you’re psychic about the weather.

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